Primitive Amputations

On a cool, sunny day in the middle of December, the primitive amputations began.

Patients formed a line down the driveway as Chucks set up a sawing station.

I set up a cleaning and sanding station.

And the amputations of uneven limbs proceeded at quite a fast clip.

The discarded body parts littered the yard.

The saved limbs were straight and sturdy.

Recovering from surgery and preparing for the cleaning and sanding.

After a thorough waxing, the patients relaxed in the sun.

Showing off their glowing patina.

The healthy, happy group made the journey to Booth W-10, Riverfront Antique Mall, North Augusta, SC.






Chucks and I are not real doctors.

We just play one on blogs.

See y'all!

NOTE:  I updated my coupon code for my Etsy shop.  I was embarrassed to find out my coupons had expired.  There are new listings for you to browse.  Enjoy!

Use this discount code to receive 10% off your purchase at the Distressed Donna Etsy store:

DISTRESSEDDONNA15

SHOP HERE! 

Show and Share No.246 at Coastal Charm
Vintage Inspiration Party #174 
Share Your Cup #134  
The Cottage Market Presents Junkin Joe Every Friday   

Low Country Crawling With Leia

Why was Leia just standing around on a street corner in Summerville, South Carolina on a Tuesday afternoon?

She was taking a short rest while we decided where to eat our very late lunch.




We had been on a Low Country Crawl through several thrift shops.

We started at nine in the morning.

It was after three, and we were waiting for an estate sale to start at four.

We had already scored the ugliest piece of furniture either of us had ever seen.

If you were the one who created this...this...this...
thing, then you need to learn restraint.

Yes, under all that fabric I do think there might be a bit of beauty.

We shall see.

Since our planned restaurant was not open, we settled on Montreux Bar & Grill.  

Leia had been there.  

I had not, but hope to go again.


The atmosphere is great.

And the food delicious.

Leia had a smoked shredded chicken sandwich with jalapeno mayo.

I had the salmon/strawberry salad.

Here is the front of the grill.

See the lady hiding behind the tree?

She was in every shot I took - before and after eating.

It became a joke of where she would show up next.

Montreaux is filled with artwork.

There is an old bicycle hanging over the bar.

I did take a pic of it.

That lady walked right through the shot and sat down.

Really!

I had planned to abandon some journal tags for this week's art abandonment.

Our waitress had a nice quirky attitude, 
and I felt the "It's good to be the queen" tags would suit her perfectly.

I abandoned the tags in the chair next to me so she would find them when she cleared the table.

Now it was time to go find the estate sale.

I was surprised at the quality of the items even though it was the second night of the sale.

I bought the huge Mark Twain Compilation.

The basket of silver - mainly for the assortment of fish and pickle forks.

And one baby spoon.

The sales manager threw in the plastic silverware hiding in the back.

Well, it will come in handy stirring small batches of paint.

The largest glove mold I have seen.

Size 14 - used to mold men's heavy duty industrial gloves.

I have been looking for a dainty ladies mold, but had to have this giant.

It looks great on the mantel with the heads already there.


I also bought a wooden ladder and some advertising yardsticks.

I will show these and all the other items we found along the way on our Low Country Crawl in the next post.

It took all day to unload the truck and take photos.

I am off to bed so I can rise bright and early to clean, sand and paint.

Does anyone know how to remove ugly from a piece?

See y'all!


 

Use this discount code to receive 10% off your purchase at the Distressed Donna Etsy store:

DISTRESSEDDONNA14

SHOP HERE! 

The Cottage Market Presents Junkin Joe Every Friday

Shearing Winter's Fleece

Warm temps and blue skies are here.

That could only mean one thing.

Get ready, ladies, it is time to shear your winter's fleece.

All you have to do is take a good look down.

All the winter's fleece you have been hiding under your winter's fleece has got to come off.

Now I come from a long line of basically hairless people, and the hair we do have is colorless.

But on the day the photo was taken, I felt the breeze flutter through my long leg locks and knew it was shearing time.

Also in line for shearing is Scout who is shaggy beyond shagginess.

Azalee has not a care in the world.

She can sleep knowing her fleece is quite short.

No shearing to do here!

How does a cat curl in a perfect circle?

I do wonder if Annie has a wax for this job.

A nice dark patina.

With a smooth finish.

With a huge grin and a humorous wink, I hope this post has made you smile.

Today is my blog's second birthday.

I decided to celebrate with a little humor.

I love being a citizen of Bloglandia.

Thank you, faithful readers and dear friends!

And, ladies, I was NOT kidding about the shearing of the winter's fleece!

See y'all!

Use this discount code to receive 10% off your purchase at the Distressed Donna Etsy store:

DISTRESSEDDONNA14

SHOP HERE! 

Lessons Learned From Summer Vacation

 You may have noticed I have been gone for several days.  My niece Olivia has been visiting.  I have learned several lessons this week.

I am not seventeen.  I will never be seventeen again.  BUT I can keep up with a seventeen-year old.

Barely!

 
I will never understand coffee or hot tea.

Olivia must imbibe one or the other several times a day.

 It is truly delightful to wake in the morning with a piece of art taped to your door.

Especially when there is a bird on it!

I can walk at three miles an hour on the treadmill at the gym while Olivia can run 6.6 miles an hour.

I can lift more weight longer than Olivia can.

(Score one for the 59's!)

 I should have taken photos of my house before and after to prove I can actually clean up a total disaster of a mess.

Painting supplies can be corralled on the bottom of an upside down chair.

(Okay, I didn't describe exactly HOW I straightened the mess!)

 It is nice to have new pieces of art to display.

It is nice to have a low-maintenance young lady around to share things with.

Olivia can visit the library twice in three days to check out a stack of books to read while finishing Atlas Shrugged for summer reading.







 

A firm cat lover can overcome her fear of dogs to go to the dog park and become one of their pack.

This same cat lover can go to the SPCA to play with the kittens to socialize them and fall in love with a dog!

(Wish I had had my camera for the pics of Olivia and Sly cuddled together.)

We can and did visit as many bookstores as possible.






Thrift shops take your mind off continuous days of 
rain,
rain,
rain!

You can (and we did) have excellent sushi and ginger salad for lunch followed by French roast coffee (Olivia) and French macaroons for dessert.

Lavender macaroons.

Pistachio macaroons.

Served by a tres beau homme Francais!

(Which I hope translates loosely as a very handsome French guy!)

Well, I will be around to catch up with reading your blog posts.  I hope you have completed some exciting and creative projects.  I have several to post so come back again.

See y'all!

If I'da Known You Were Coming, I'da Shaved My Legs!

 I am in the witless protection program for crimes against fashion.  After years of teaching in outfits which reflected the seasons and holidays during the year, I have lapsed into rags that have little resemblance to clothing.

Panty hose?  Have not worn them in years. (Tights sometimes.)

Dresses?  Do not currently own one that actually fits.

Coat?  Have a beautiful leather parka given to me by my late MIL for Christmas in the early 90's.  Worn four times.

High heels?  Not in two decades.  Clark clogs and Bjorndahl sandals and athletic shoes.

Hats?  Not on my huge head!

 Here is a typical spring outfit.  It is great for cleaning house or for painting.  

Notice the abstract art on the front of the tee.

Notice the ragged shorts.

Notice those stylin' shoes complete with overspray.

Notice the bandana to keep the hair out of the paint.

(I promised to grow my hair for a cancer patient hair program.  I am ashamed to say I may not make it.  The hair is driving me crazy!)

I asked Chucks to take the photos for this post.

He said he wondered why I had brushed my hair and put on a bra.

Also, this is my best outfit - the others were just too, too ragged.

Winters the outfit consists of sweats.

I do own at least ten blue denim shirts - long-sleeved, short-sleeved, and sleeveless.

Countless tees in varying degrees of painted colors.

Two pairs of jeans.

Several pairs of shorts and capris.

This is my shopping outfit.  I am drawn to white tanks and tees even though they rarely last for long without paint or stain.

(I am watching out the window at a man taking away the two cot frames I had planned to buy!)

Always a cross-body bag when shopping!

Always my favorite watch - I even sleep in it.

Chucks was reluctant to let me hold the camera.

You notice we have matching outfits? 

It only took him two years of retirement to devolve into wearing pajama bottoms and a tee all day long.


We belong together.

Manicure by Rust-Oleum.

Satin Oregano with a light distressing of Sweet Pea.

  Dressed to go out - 

in 1971!  (To a French Club Masquerade Ball.)

I will be shopping next week for something more appropriate to wear.  Like maybe some flip flops!

See y'all!

Want to join the fun this week?  Link up your total couture at Tongue In Cheek!

Link up here!

 

I WILL BE OVER AT FUNKY JUNK TONIGHT, APRIL 26, TO HONOR DONNA'S TEDDY.

GO HERE!